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I duno!!!

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Skip the ~ -~ if you're not interested kay! There are pictures belowW!! Scroll scroll!!

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I have something to ask my friends to do.
Think of something good or even recognizable of me.
Really think of something and don’t forget what you thought cause by the end of this chapter,I’m sure you’ll change your views on me.

P/s : Its not about being emo,its time I made my confessions.

I was never a good grandchild. I mistreated the respected whilst her stay in my place.
She loved me much but although I did I doubt I ever gave her back the same vibe.
Which made me live with guilt since her death.
I am still not a good child to my parents.
I try and make my parents proud but somehow I fail at it every single time.
I want to be just like my brother who never fails to awe my parents,family but I fail.
But amongst all, I know that I still have to persevere.

But sometimes incidents occur which makes you wonder what you really good at?
And so I conclude I am not good at anything.
Seriously .

As much as I try to excel at my studies I simply can’t be among the bright ones which eventually is every family’s dream.
To have their child be known as the bright one.
Off recent, I also learnt that I’m not a good team mate in a certain group which totally broke me.
But no quite ,cause, what happened today was even worse.

Had a certain class earlier.
May be known as my passion, but getting picked on is harsh for me.Been so for the last 12 years. Imagine my plight.
So bad, I had all thoughts about fleeing from the place and never returning.It was that bad. I controlled my disappointment.
I want to excel and graduate at the field of my passion too, but deep down I know I can’t do it cause I proved myself today that I’m not capable.
Thanks Thurga, for the endless smses and your concerned calls.

And on my journey home, that’s when I couldn’t control anymore.
Pained me much. I tried to think of something I may be good at but at the precise moment I know that I’m not good at it nevertheless.But today made me lose the smallest amount of confidence I have left.
And so it was expressed in the forms of tears in the bus. I hate to do it but I couldn’t.
You don’t have any idea how your random phone call at that point of time made me smile/laugh while you complained about the crowd at your workplace and started swearing at them. You made me forgot my troubles then, even thou my tears didn’t stop.
But even then , I realised I wasn’t really good enough to deserve you.
Not you, not Amy,not Juen, not Tnesh,Sarah,Rara,Mira..anyone.

Was I ever a good friend?
Explains the number of friends who abandoned me by walking out of my life.
But still, as what someone once told me, to realise that I do have the bestfriends I could have ever when I asked him what best things I have?
Did I ever do something for my friends,big and great?
Yeh,all I managed to do was say, ‘I’m there for you.’ Which any other random could too.

A good cousin?
A good tutor?

Nope.
Was I good at anything at all?
Was I good at debating?Nope,I got lucky at the instances my team won.
Was I ever talented in something?

No,No,No.

I either stop my outside activities halfway or not excel at it.

I was in a certain martial arts.
I was in a certain computer course.
I was in a band which I loved with all my heart.
I stopped after sometime though my interest never faded.

Right now I’m also learning …
But I’m sure I am never gona excel at it.

And so, me, a person with half past 6 attributes I don’t see …

Yep, I’m this close in saying I am not a good person in total.
But,cause someday, I want to make my parents proud.To the extent they are able to have the jolt of excitement while they speak of me like they do of my brother always and off late,currently with him being overseas.
Make my brother proud.Though I will never be as good as you bro, maybe just maybe I might do you proud.
I want to support my family well in the future.
Make my family proud.(Cousins)
Be able to tell myself I’m good at this particular field with no contradiction.
Hear from my friends themselves that they would never ever trade me for someone else.

And lastly from my grandma be it even in my mind/dream that she forgave me and still loves me.

Have I change your views yet?
I’m pretty sure I have. Yet I’ll continue doing my thing.

~

That’s just one chapter of my book!
Happy reading my post now.

Today’s my mum’s birthday. Nope I wont reveal her age. But she certainly doesn’t look her age la.
I met Juen yesterday to go get some prezzies for my mum.
So I bought her this Adidas perfume set with a body spray which comes in a bag altogether.
And also bought her a handbag . Juen, you know what? My mum loves the bag. Nice choice bro.

Juen was such an ass know. Lol, we were going down the escalator from the station area to the bus interchange at Woodlands.
And there was this Chinese boy and a lady infront of us. The boy looked 7 yrs old from the back and the lady looked old enough,short thou to be his mum.
And Juen was so funny la.
She was talking normally saying, ‘Wahhh, you see this boy got gf seh want to hug hug all..’
And that poor boy was just being nice with his mum hugging!!!!! Omg Juen!!!
Hahahhaha.And I’m like, ‘Omggg, Juen its his mum la!’
And she started saying, ‘Omg!!! Ouh..’ and started laughing.
She always makes me laugh la.
Lol.

Yep, my brother called this morning to wish my mum.
Bro, heard the paper was tough. But you know,I’m so sure you would excel at your exams all the same. You’re my brother afterall. :)
23 days to your arrival bro.
Need you more than ever,although it means I’m cutting my outside life.
HAHA. :D
My parents went for a Wedding at Khalsa earlier evening while I went for my d.class.

Kkk, I know you guys thinking how come no details about Jesz or Vallavan.
Lol, I got nothing to say today lor. : (
Damn sad uh, but !!!!Something interesting happened earlier at the OCBC at Northpoint while I waited with my d.mate for another d.mate.
So this Indian guy approached us, and he gave two coupons to my mate Priya. And she hesitated before taking it .

Then he just stared at us waiting .Hahha, and finally she did, and it was a coupon with Yogi B and this Indian Actor on the coupon on the release of this movie, ‘Pollathavan.’
Ya’ll remember how I had a video of Yogi b saying he performed in this movie, yep so its officially released in Singapore!!!!
OMG, I’M GONA WATCH. I DON’T CARE.
And all my mate Priya said was, ‘They gave the coupon to right person la.’
Lol, which means me!!!
Hahaha, she still couldn’t believe Jesz actually called me. : )
She read my blog kay, I wasnt bragging about it!
Hahaha. She was like, ‘How la he called you?’ She's a fan of Dr.Burn.
Oh well.

This was the picture on that piece of advertisement, thou it was in white and blacK.

Jesz and Yogi B! :) I absolutely love Jesz in this outfit, hair and what not.

Fanssss.

His cornrows! Wooooo!

Awesome as ever.

I’m very tired. Throbbing headache and confused thoughts maan.
Psssh. Wished I was somewhere else.

I will be going to my Seanpaul cousin house tomorrow.
Visit my aunt and also my cousins and then collect my clothes which been there for damn long. Lol.
I miss them.Infact I miss the whole lot of them lor. And also people like Diamond,Arun and all.
:)

And also, I’m having a dinner at my Portuguese cousins’ house tomorrow.
Juen come k?

ROD. Lol. LOVE YA'LL.

Funny and lovely people.

Arun!! :)

Daniel Ramesh.

Loves.
So tell me, what am I good at?